Present moment

There is usually a point on the journey where things get hard, and I knew that I would probably hit a point this Lenten season where craziness would ensue. I didn’t set out to “blog” as an intention in itself; this blog has been an unanticipated outgrowth of an intention to nourish my spirit as often and as much as I nourish my body. I have been reading, meditating, engaging in centering prayer and contemplative thought. Time has always seemed to present itself, and stories have been in my mind when I carve time to write them.

Then, there is this week. My to-do list is growing, I have been away from my home more than in it, stressors abound at work while my daughter is not feeling well at home and just wants her Mom, and I am not there in the ways she wishes I would be. That elusive work-life balance (a term I am beginning to abhor) is no where to be found. So this morning, I walked in spite of the coldness that has re-emerged after we thought spring was here. It was difficult to motivate myself, and never felt pleasant to be honest. And, I am writing this note as much to myself as to anyone who might read it. It feels disjointed and unpolished, but I am writing it nevertheless. I am then going to shower and pack and drive to city number three in as many days. And I am going to push through this time and stubbornly try to focus, to keep writing and reflecting and spiritually centered in an attempt to not give in to the frenetic pace of life that so often sends me spinning out of balance. Sometimes, the journey involves doing the best we can in the moment, with a faith that the moment will bring us what we need either as we live it, or when we get through it.

Maybe that is the point of lent, too. It is easy to give up something or take on an intention when the stars align and all is working in our favor. Then comes the hour when it we feel like it is too much, when we want to cry out to a God in which we believe, or hope, or trust, or wonder is there and ask that divine inspiration to figure out how to make it through intact to the other side of the swirling, raging storm for us. Then we realize, this is life. It has to be lived in the highs, the lows, and the just plain ordinary. All are aspects of this life.

To stay on the journey requires faith and forward momentum, even by a single step. And so, I rise to greet this day in the present moment. Let there be light.

About harasprice

Social worker, professor, seminarian in The Episcopal Church, student, parent, teacher, writer, advocate, and grateful traveller along this journey through life
This entry was posted in Lent 2014. Bookmark the permalink.

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